Welcome to the Chaos Circus
Some days, I wake up with a shit-ton of pain, half-forget what I was doing, and realize I’m already five tabs deep in my brain by the time I’ve got my coffee in hand. It’s like walking into a room, forgetting why you went in, and just standing there like, “Well, fuck it.”
One minute, I’m smashing it—creative, productive, feeling like I’m on top of the world. The next, I’m on the couch, feeling like getting out of bed should earn me a fucking medal.
If someone had told me at 18 that by 40 I would have a body that hated me and a brain that zigzags harder than an Indy 500 final lap, I would have told you you had lost your damned mind.
Fibromyalgia and ADHD? Separate messes, sure. But together? It’s like mixing gasoline with fire—pure chaos. Want to make it explode even more? Toss in an ASD diagnosis for good measure.
Fibro Fog + ADHD Brain = What Was I Saying?
Pain flare-ups and executive dysfunction? Yeah, that’s the perfect storm. If fibromyalgia had a tagline, it’d be: “Foggy brain with a side of ‘Did I take my meds?’” And that mental fog? Oh, it’s basically ADHD with extra fuzziness. You think I’m joking? It’s like trying to run a marathon when you’re already in the middle of a nap. After drinking three pots of coffee. I’ll forget what I was doing mid-sentence or lose the whole damn thought altogether.
This isn’t a ‘just keep going’ situation—it’s a ‘what the hell was I saying?’ moment. Again.
Productivity Culture Can F*ck Off
Let’s be clear: ‘Rise and grind’ doesn’t work when your joints feel like they’re crushed by a 10-ton truck. Or when your spine’s muscles are knotted up like a bad crochet project. Or when your brain is still snoozing. That “get up and hustle” mentality? Nah, not here. Because the truth is: there’s guilt in not being able to do “enough.” And let’s be real, the definition of “enough” changes from day to day.
Sometimes my “success” looks like cranking out an essay. Other days, it’s getting my ass out of bed and brushing my teeth. Some days, I’m on fire and can tackle school assignments (because I thought it was a GREAT idea to go back to college at 43, with unmedicated ADHD and fibro at its highest peak ever!), write content, wrangle words for my novel, and chase every rabbit trail that ADHD threw at me. Other days, I’m lucky if my socks match. And you know what? That’s enough. Sometimes, just surviving the day is the biggest win. Productivity? I’m rethinking the whole damn thing.
So, to the people who think success and productivity are what define a person? Piss off. You have no idea what it’s like to have a squirrel living in your head and an arthritic grandma knotting your muscles into discount macramé from hell.
Adaptation Is Not Failure
Let’s drop the notion that adapting to chronic illness or neurodivergence means you’re lazy. Spoiler alert: it’s not. Tools like bullet journals, alarms, flexible to-do lists, and color-coded spoon tracking—these aren’t crutches, they’re lifesavers. Every workaround, every tiny adjustment? Celebrate that shit like it’s your greatest achievement, because guess what? It is. We’re out here innovating just to survive, and that’s something worth applauding.
Spoon Theory: But Make It ADHD-Friendly
Let’s talk spoon theory for a minute. Don’t know what that is? It’s a metaphor for how we manage the energy we have relative to the things we need to accomplish in a day. Let’s be real. No one has an unlimited number of spoons. But for people living with ADHD, we have to work harder to make them last throughout the day, or else we are borrowing trouble. Literally.
If you’re not familiar with Spoon Theory, here’s the gist: your spoons are your energy for the day. Each task uses up a spoon, and when they’re gone, you’re toast. But let’s make it ADHD-friendly, shall we? It’s not just about “saving spoons,” it’s about using them strategically without thinking you can squeeze out one more spoon from an empty jar.
Use spoon levels as a daily planning tool, but also know that it’s okay if your spoons don’t always line up with what you think you can do. (Spoiler: they won’t). But that’s why planning for the low-energy days and the unexpected flares is crucial. You don’t have to conquer the world every damn day. Just don’t burn yourself out trying.
The Real MVPs: Routines That Flex
Here’s the thing: routines are your best friend—but not the kind that come with rigid, “I must do everything by 8 AM or die” schedules. Nope. Routines that flex? Those are your lifelines. You need a routine that works around your energy, not against it. If it bends, it won’t break. Find the balance, build something that adapts to your rhythms (or lack thereof), and embrace that you don’t have to be rigid to be productive.
Burnout Is Real, and It Sneaks Up
Burnout? It’s like the silent ninja of chronic illness and neurodivergence. You don’t see it coming until you’re already in freefall. And when you’re juggling pain and brain fog? Burnout hits faster than a speeding bullet. It sneaks in when you least expect it. And here’s the kicker: you’ve gotta spot it early—before you hit that “fuck it, I’m done” wall. Listen to your body. If you’re running on fumes, it’s okay to put the brakes on. Stopping doesn’t mean quitting.
You’re Still Getting Sh*t Done
Let’s end this on a truth bomb: just because you didn’t hit every damn task on your to-do list today doesn’t mean you’ve failed. You’re still getting shit done. Maybe not at the pace the productivity cult would like, but hell—surviving this chaos is an achievement in itself. Success isn’t about doing more; it’s about doing what you can, despite everything. Your worth isn’t measured by your output. You’re a fucking miracle just for showing up.
Chronic Illness Doesn’t Get the Last Word
Living in a body that’s constantly fighting you, yet still getting out of bed? That’s fucking badass. Chronic illness might try to have the last word, but it’s not winning. You’re writing the story here. The hard days? They don’t get to define you. Keep pushing, keep adapting, keep being your own version of a badass—and most importantly, keep going. You’re doing better than you think.
Now It’s Your Turn
What adaptations have helped you get through the day? What are your “little victories”? I wanna hear it all—drop a comment, share your experiences, and let’s celebrate the wins, big or small.
💥 If this hit home, you’re not alone—and I’ve got more where that came from. Sign up for weekly updates, check out my shop, or just toss a spoon in the tip jar so I can keep screaming into the void (and maybe buy some Aleve).
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